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I've occasionally received invitations to attend exciting conferences, only to find that my hosts wish me to roast someone rather than present my philosophical work. Below I've collected some of these.

I wrote this in 2009, when I was invited to the University of Connecticut in order to roast Professor Ruth Millikan on the occasion of the 25th anniversary of her groundbreaking Language, Truth, and Other Biological Categories.

I delivered these introductory remarks at SoberFest, a celebration of UW's own Elliott Sober, on the occasion of his 65th birthday.

This is a toast I wrote on the occasion of Jim Anderson's retirement from the UW Philosophy Department, in 2012. It was delivered at our annual end of the year party in May.

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